Change is hard

I am sitting here trying to write a crap (first) draft of a second book in a three-book series.  And I'll have to say, it's rather difficult.  I've got a plot, I've spent one whole book exploring characters, giving them life, back stories, goals, fears.  But I still struggle with this second book.  Why?

Because my characters have to change.  Their relationship, their natures, their wants, desires all change as a consequence of the world we live in. 

Change is hard.

Change is hard to write.

Change is hard to write about.

We live in a changing world.  Someone once said you never see the same thing twice.  That's probably true.  More dust has settled on the bureau or night stand in the bedroom in the few seconds between glances, more sun fade on the carpet.  So the very objects around us are changing, decaying, growing.

And so do our relationships.

Sometimes the change is small, a gradual growth of love, imperceptible, deepening without realization.  Sometimes it's very dramatic, a fight, a blunder, forgiveness, apology.

But, nonetheless, we are always changing.  Sometimes that makes me sad.  I want to hold on to moments like my children's kisses, an embrace, a laugh.  Other times, I am so glad that something changed, like a pay increase, or less responsibility.

Change makes life dynamic, sorrowful, joyful, painful, and exciting.  Sometimes it's just hard to make that leap.

What are some of the changes you've had in your life?


  1. Marriage and children have brought my most significant changes. And I guess when I think about change right now I'm thinking about changes I see in myself over the years. That's something I've been thinking about lately, anyway. Though I'd looked forward to both marriage and children for my whole life, they've both brought me things I didn't expect. They brought challenges I didn't know to think about, bringing about changes in perspective that changed how I went about things. For example, I thought I knew how to cook when I got married, but really I knew how to bake lots of things. I didn't really know cooking much at all. I had to learn as I went.
    Life for us has changed with each child we've given birth to and with each new experience in each new place to live. And then there are the trials that come along the way. They have brought some of the biggest changes, and it seems to me that the way I got through them has been through a change (or several changes) in perspective. That is such a comfort to me. I've learned that when life stinks and I just feel like complaining, there's always another perspective, another way to look at things, that makes it easier to bear.
    Maybe I shouldn't be writing this in the middle of the night, but I'm waiting for children to fall asleep, so I don't really have much else to do. ;) Just kidding. But I guess the thing about change is that it changes me, and it does so by helping my perspective change. Is that what I'm trying to say? ;)

  2. Christine, I love your words. I think having children and marriage were the biggest changes in my life. When I became a mom, my whole world shifted from myself to others and it was a hard shift for me, hahah! The trials have made me a better, stronger person. I have learned so much from change! Thanks for posting!


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