Thursday, May 30, 2019

Top Five Words to Avoid for Deep POV

Deep POV is one of my favorite things to write in. It's close. It's personal. It's deep. It heightens the emotion of the character and brings the reader closer.

I just turned in my second romantic suspense. A sequel to my Baker's Dozen romantic suspense mystery. My editor sent me a guide of words to eliminate in my writing. Here are my top favorite to avoid.

1. Saw
If your point of view character saw something, just say what he saw.

Alan saw Margret brush a stray hair from her eyes.


Margret brushed a stray hair from her eyes.

2. Thought
If you are in your character's head, you rarely need to mention he thought something. We want to stay close to the writer's sensibilities, almost mimicking his thought.

Alan thought there had to be a better way than this.


There had to be a better way than this.

3. Felt
 If you have to tell us she felt something, then it destroys the sense of closeness.

Margaret felt angry.


Margaret beat her fists against the wall.

4. Listened/heard
If your character hears something, just say it. No need to tell us she heard it.

Margaret heard the coming footsteps in the hall.


Footsteps sounded in the hall.

5. Smelled
Don't tell us she smelled it, tell us what the smell was.

Margaret smelled blood tinged with bleach.


Blood with a tinge of bleach reached her nose.

Third Place from Book Buyer's Best Contest

A sweet romance wins third place Sweet romances can compete and win! I'm super excited for this honor.  I want to tell you, please keep ...